listen here

Patriot Broadcast From the Trenches Schedule 

Or you can mail donations to Henry Shivley at P.O. Box 964, Chiloquin, OR 97624

Satire: “Pentagon: Cuts Could Hamper Ability To Invade Countries For No Reason”

Running ‘Cause I Can’t Fly – by Andy Borowitz

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)— “The spending cuts mandated by the sequester may hamper the United States’s ability to invade countries for absolutely no reason, a Pentagon spokesman warned today.The Pentagon made this gloomy assessment amid widespread fears that the nation’s ability to wage totally optional wars based on bogus pretexts may be in peril.

“Historically, the United States has stood ready and able to throw billions of dollars at a military campaign with no clear rationale or well-defined objective,” said spokesman Harland Dorrinson. “Our capacity to wage war willy-nilly is now in jeopardy.”

In the past, Mr. Dorrinson said, the Pentagon has had the resources to fight three meaningless and completely random wars at any given time, “but now in our planning meetings we are cutting that number back to two.”

Sen. Lindsey Graham (R—S.C.) agreed about the catastrophic effects of the Pentagon cuts, telling reporters, “The ability of the United States to project its military power in an arbitrary and totally capricious way must never be compromised.” The cuts are already being felt in a tangible way at the Pentagon, which today cancelled an order for a nine-thousand-dollar pen.”

- http://www.newyorker.com/

http://coyoteprime-runningcauseicantfly.blogspot.com/2013/03/satire-pentagon-cuts-could-hamper.html

This entry was posted in News. Bookmark the permalink.
1936
Don't forget to answer the Security Question before you post comment.

2 Responses to Satire: “Pentagon: Cuts Could Hamper Ability To Invade Countries For No Reason”

  1. Incriminally Sane says:

    Whew, thank goodness this was just a satirical article as I was worried that we would not reach our objective of 90% population reduction, control of the globes resources and all the 9000 dollar pens I could ever need. What would I do without a new world order.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

What is 8 + 6 ?
Please leave these two fields as-is:
IMPORTANT! To be able to proceed, you need to solve the following simple math (so we know that you are a human) :-)